The family: truth and welcome

“The reality of life in Europe testifies to and confirms the fact that in our Countries families’ situation is extremely serious”. Msgr. Jozef Michalik, President of the Polish Bishops’ Conference underlines the reasons why last week cardinals, archbishops, and bishops from Central and Eastern Europe (Hungary, Croatia, Czech Republic, Slvakia, Ukraine, Lithuania, Belarus and Poland) decided to convene in Warsaw to discuss the major challenges that European families are called to face, ahead of October’s synod. “Decreasing birth-rates and migration flows have direly put to the test families experiencing difficult situations”, the bishops said. “Moreover, people have not fully assimilated the concept of mutual love that can continue and develop in the course of a lifetime. People don’t believe in a ‘forever’ relationship that can go on and be a source of happiness. Even the media promote a concept of love that does not reflect a lifelong challenge involving the individual as a whole, in his/her full integrity, and conversely present it as a momentary pleasure. Today any crises and doubt can cause deep crises, while the indissolubility of marriage is seen in relative terms”. Some countries have adopted measures that fail to help the family, with legislation and fiscal systems negatively impact also large families”. To what extent does the economic crisis weigh upon family life? “Indeed, the ongoing crisis impacts the life of European families. Unemployment, for example, prevents young couples from building a future together. Not having a job is a burden. Worse still, it’s a tragedy. As relates to young people, the phenomenon of cohabitation is spreading. People prefer living together without taking long-term responsibilities. The yearning to fight together, to build a family, is waning. And economic difficulties aren’t the only cause. Changes in the perception of having a family are also determined by ongoing trends and egoism. I wonder what example young people received from their parents, and from adults in general”. What answers emerge before this situation? “The Church should remain faithful to the truth. She must proclaim with faith and promote truth, the wisdom that comes from the Lord. The Church doesn’t have a magic wand and it can’t solve problems with the flip of a coin. The Church has faith in the Lord and also in mankind. And by means of this faith she strives to shed light in darkness and show the way leading to the large path of the love of the Father. The Church cannot surrender to human weakness. With care and respect towards every person’s conscience she must show what is true, safe and just. Not what is convenient”.  Divorce, irregularity, failure to be faithful, difficulties in saying ‘yes’ forever: what is the Church’s approach vis a vis these situations? “It’s the approach she always had, namely, to continue welcoming and helping people find the right way, without causing suffering and preventing more serious damage; reminding people that God is stronger than our weaknesses. Given the challenges of indissolubility and of the pureness of the heart it could be deemed impossible. Instead, it should be said that this is possible for those who believe and are open to the presence of God in their lives. The Lord did not erase any of the precepts. Not even a word is cancelled. But it should be said that these forces are to be found within ourselves”. But we’re often under the impression that the doors of the Church are closed to those who failed and made mistakes. “Not only doors are open. There will always be a helping, extended hand. The solution is not to accept weakness but to help the weak, those who fell, who failed to get back to their feet. It would be wrong to say that nothing has happened. Because something did, in fact, happen. In the case of a failed marriage something broke. And children bear the consequences. It is necessary to encourage those involved not to repeat the same mistake, because repeated wounds can be deathly”. Why did Pope Francis decide to dedicate a Synod to the family? “Because this Pope has the right vision of the world. Even the first Synod chaired by Blessed John Paul II was focused on the family. It’s thus a sign, a coincidence, but it also highlights an awareness: the intention to look beyond, to reflect on the origin of the problem. Who is most attacked by post-modern ideologies? This is the most serious danger because if the foundation collapses, so will the whole of society. But if man has a stable point of reference, he manages to resist difficulties. By choosing the family, the Church and the Pope want to show that hope does exist”.