Family and love, social “engines”

In Portuguese, his mother tongue, it is “Só o amor gera vida – Pessoa, Família e Sociedade”. Namely, “Only love generates life – the Human Person, the family and society”. It is the title of a weighty volume that brings together years of studies, experiences, encounters, first in Portugal and now on the European scene, by Msgr. Duarte da Cunha, Secretary General of CCEE (Council of European Bishops’ Conferences). Ranging from Bible to anthropology, pastoral care and theology, Father Da Cunha carried out an in-depth reflection on the family, to which is dedicated the upcoming ordinary Synod. The foreword to the book is written by seven couples of the équipe Notre Dame, whom the priest has been accompanying in their faith journey. Gianni Borsa interviewed him for SIR Europe. Padre Da Cunha, you affirm that “love generates life”, but in your book this belief appears to extend beyond biological procreation. Thus in order to deeply understand love, is it necessary to examine all the dimensions of the human person? “Love, as I intend to say, long before being a reality to discuss about, is a concrete experience to be shared. But precisely because it is a human experience it involves all that pertains to the human person. The physical body and feelings are present in love. But even more, we find freedom and will, that bring a person close to another, with the willingness to love each other and be there for one another. Reason is equally involved, as it seeks to understand what is good for the other person. Moreover, the elements of a human person are all present in love. I wish to add that those who love, do so as a person, namely as a unit. The one who loves and the beloved person are a complex unit: but they are truly ‘one’… We must not forget that when we love and we are loved in return we reflect the other dimension of the human person that is natural and necessary: sociality. The image of God, to whose image man was created, is not the individual alone but a communion of people. Conversely, individualism is an evil of our societies that poses a threat to families and individuals alike. Love is the best antidote against individualism”. The human person, the family, and society: if appropriately understood, love thus has a social value; it regards the “common good”. In your opinion, is this view to be found in modern societies? “We often find that love is spoken of in the media, on television for example, but unfortunately mostly in TV-series. Love is addressed as a mere feeling, separated from those dimensions that are more specifically human, namely reason and freedom. Precisely for this reason – just like faith – it is often confined to the private sphere, as if it were an exclusively subjective experience. Love isn’t seen as the true cement of social life. While when we are motivated by love, we are committed to ensuring everyone’s dignity. We creatively find ways to help others. We understand the meaning of labour as participation in the creation of a common good. Political proposals are made for the promotion of solidarity, the respect of every human person. But are we really sure that love can be a form of policy-making? I would like to add something else…” What? “We need theology to understand love. In Christ we learn that true love is self-bestowal. Jesus on the Cross offers his life for us, but with a very precise goal: that we may be in communion with the Most Holy Trinity. In order to love as Jesus has commanded us, we need revelation and redemption. In donating his life Jesus has been not only an example but also redemption of the human heart, and for this, those who remain ‘in Him’ manage to love ‘like Him’. Thus it appears absolutely necessary that the new evangelization be also evangelization in love”. Love also means education, taking care of children and of the young generations. Often an “educational urgency” is mentioned at ecclesial level. What do you think about this? “Love wanting the other person’s good, educating therefore is first of all the fruit of love. Parents educate their children; they are thus the first and most competent educators because they love their children. And love is the first, primary element of true education. Precisely for this reason to care for families and love in the family also means to care for the future of the young generations. Indeed, it might be true that today child education is met with difficulties owing to rapid cultural transformations imposed, for example by transformations in mores, the demands of modern life and by new technologies. We often witness tensions and misunderstandings between parents and their offspring, but this does not question the primary role of love in education. A father and a mother educate their children because they love then, even if they’re not computer or Internet experts”. The universal Church is preparing for October’s Synod. In your opinion what are the most important and the most delicate issues involving the family in Europe today? “In order to understand the mission of the family and its vocation it’s important to present a anthropology in harmony with the reality of the human person, that is not the result of trends or ideologies, whilst clinging to a deeply evangelical theology of love. I’m not only referring to treatise to be studied but to life experiences. We need people who testify to their humanity in an attractive way. As saints do. And there are many families that live true life-bearing love, according to God’s plan. The Synod will certainly address these questions that represent the orientation of pastoral ministry. But I believe that it’s also important to share, with examples of good practices, the belief of a Church that accompanies the path of every person and every family, with the purpose of bringing to everyone the fullness of joy and supporting those families that are suffering for difficult situations. At the same time the Church, that is present in the world to spread the Good News received by the Lord for everyone’s good, intends to support all those committed in public life to promote and defend the family and love”.